A wife goes to consult a psychiatrist about her husband

A wife goes to consult a psychiatrist about her husband: “My husband is acting so weird.

He drinks his morning coffee and then he goes and eats the mug! He only leaves the handle!”

Psychiatrist: “Yes, that is weird. The handle is the best part.“

Jatt VS Baniya

Jatt:Oye Yara Machli Khaega?

Baniya:Nahi Yaar Us me Kaante Hote Hain.

Jatt:Oye Chhor Yaar,

Chappal Pehen K Kha Lena…

I managed to lose my rifle

I managed to lose my rifle when I was in the army. I had to pay $855 to cover the loss.

I’m starting to understand why a Navy captain always goes down with his ship.

Sleep with an open window tonight

Sleep with an open window tonight!

1400 mosquitos like that. 420 mosquitos commented on it. 210 mosquitos shared this.

One mosquito invited for the event. 2800 mosquitos will be attending the event.

Air hostess to Jatt

Air hostess: Sir kya loge?
Jatt: Milk Badam, Kheer, Bread Pakora n Tandoori Chicken wid Naan..
Airhostess: Sir tusi jahaaz te aaye ho,.
Apne PYO DE VYAAH te nhi!.

Pati to Patni

Pati: mere marne ke baad, kyaa tum doosri shaadi karogi?
Patni: nahi. main apni behan ki saath rahungi. aap?
Pati: main bhi tumhaare behan ke saath rahunga

Doctor to Patient

Doctor: is dawaa ko ek hafte main poora karo aur baad main aake milo.
Patient: teek hai doctor
(ek hafte ke baad)
Doctor: dawaa khatam huaa kya?
Patient: nahi doctor.
Doctor: kyu nahi?
Patient: usme likhaa thaa ke, bottle ko hamesha bandh rakhe

How was school today

Mother: "How was school today, Patrick?"

Patrick: "It was really great mum! Today we made explosives!"

Mother: "Ooh, they do very fancy stuff with you these days. And what will you do at school tomorrow?"

Patrick: "What school?"

A man asks a farmer

A man asks a farmer near a field, “Sorry sir, would you mind if I crossed your field instead of going around it? You see,
I have to catch the 4:23 train.”
The farmer says, “Sure, go right ahead. And if my bull sees you, you’ll even catch the 4:11 one.” 

Tu sohni tera na sohni

Tu sohni tera na sohni,
Par tu sohni ban ke na dikha saki,
Sohni ta kache ghadde te v tarr ke aa gi C,
Te tu Three Wheeler te vi na aa saki!!!

Ek Bache Di Nani Us Nu Sula Rahi C

Ek Bache Di Nani Us Nu Sula Rahi C,
Te Keh Rahi C Soja Degree Soja!
Tan Pdosan Ne Puchea Esnu Degree Kio Bula Rahi Hai
Tan Usne Keha,
Meri Kudi Chandigarh Degree Lain Gai C Aah Lai K Aa Gai…